[fanfic] I’ll Hold Onto You

You’re getting way too good at living your own lies…
– Hold Onto You by Default


She’d never been good with goodbyes.

Selphie stood in front of two matching tombstones. The names read Tilmitt in deeply etched serif script as the wind picked up and gusted past. Standing there was hard but there were strong, supportive hands upon her shoulders before she crouched down in a green sundress and placed a bouquet of roses before the stones. She hugged herself tightly as if she was cold but she couldn’t seem to find the words to say.

She couldn’t remember a thing about her parents. What did they look like? What did they sound like? Were they the gentle folk that Selphie had always imagined them to be? Thousands of thoughts were running through her mind before she finally found the words to say. This wasn’t like standing in front of the graves of her friends back at Trabia. These were the parents she would never know and it stabbed at her heart repeatedly.

She could feel the tears welling in her eyes. She was getting too good at living her own lies anyway and something felt like it needed to change.

“Mom… Dad… it’s Selphie. I’m sorry that I never came sooner than now but nobody ever told me where your grave was until a couple of weeks ago. But… I’m doing alright on my own and I’m not alone. I’ve got my great big Garden family behind me and my best friends cheering me on. The big guy behind me came with me in case…”

Selphie stopped for a few moments to wipe the tears from her eyes as Irvine wrapped his arms around the girl in a protective hug. “In case she couldn’t do it on her own.”

“I… I miss you both a lot,” she whispered. This was harder than she thought it would be. “And I wish you were still here with me. There’s been so many times that I needed you and wanted to ask you so many things but I can’t even remember your faces…”

It hurt beyond belief to say these things. “I’m sorry… Mom, Dad. I think about you both everyday and I wish that the stupid war hadn’t happened. But… I’m gonna be strong and know that you’re in a better place. I bet you guys hang out with the moogles everyday. But for now…”

Thunder rumbled in the distance and the sky was darkening from the angry clouds above them.

“For now, we’d better get back to the hotel. The others are waiting for us, Sefie.”

Selphie nodded as she placed her hands on their tombstones and smiled as warmly as she could. “I’ll be strong.”

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